God is so good. In his sovereignty, God placed Emotional Healthy Spirituality in my hands. As I picked up the book, I was hooked. The book really ministered to my heart. I have been so emotionally tired the past two years. Why? Because I have been a human doing rather than a human being. John Calvin argued that true wisdom consists of knowledge of self and knowledge of God. I have been a Martha for the past two years and have not had time to think, reflect, and process. I have been distracted with many things: XL, Family, Youth Leadership, Teaching, Sunday School, Papers, School, etc. God has revealed to me how sinful I really am!! I am such a people-pleaser, thats why I can't say no to things. I masquerade that I am some sort of Super-Christian, when deep down I have not been joyful. Instead, I have been bitter, tired, angry, and discouraged. My family life shows this. God is calling me back to reflection in his love. Lord, lead me as I begin this process of Contemplative Spirituality.

1. Realize and acknowledge the sin in my life: Lying by trying to be outwardly righteous, feelings of anger and resentment. Acknowledge that I am a sinner. "Lord, have mercy upon me a sinner"

2. Rest in the presence of God. I have been a human doing rather being with God. I need time for thoughtful reflection with God.

3. Jesus did not heal everyone. It seems that I am trying to do more than Jesus himself, who was God! How absurd!

4. I have been rushing to finish school and get on with life without enjoying the journey and process. Alex, slow down with school! Slow down with ministry! Do you not believe that God is the one in the saving business?